My Turn

Yep, I'm sick. Are you surprised? I shouldn't be. Maybe it was naive to think that this time would be different. Maybe ONLY Blaine could have a medical issue and the rest of us would be fine. No such luck. I actually waited today until my mom got home from church so that I could ask her to come and watch Bryson while I went to the Urgent Care. I thought I had the flu. Starting really early on Saturday I started throwing up, then came the sinus pressure, headaches, body aches, fever, chills, diarrhea, chest pressure, coughing, extreme fatigue (I vaguely was aware of changing a couple of diapers on Sat, something Blaine couldn't do). By Sunday, I was dying. I went in and they all thought it was Swine Flu. They swabbed for Influenza A and B, which if it was positive would tell them that it was swine flu because that is all that is going around. It came back negative. She did say that I had a bacterial sinus infection, and a viral bronchitis, and a viral strain attacking my GI tract. I'll admit, usually when doctors tell me its a virus its code for "we don't know what's wrong with you", but since I got a RX for the sinus infection I'm hoping it knocks it all out, whatever it is. The plan now is to put the kids to bed at 7, so that I can go to bed too.

PS. When I went to the doctor they gave me 2 bags of an IV. Usually with that much fluid you come out heading for the bathroom. I asked for a glass of water. I think I'm dehydrated. I drink a ton, but it just isn't absorbing. Any ideas?

Bryson eating a pickle.

Pickles are one of Bryson's favorite things, but I don't know he makes all kinds of faces. He loves them, and he hates them. Should have grabbed the camera during the first half of the pickle, but I grabbed it too late and he was full so not wanting to eat, but the face was priceless.

Hernia-Out!

Blaine got his hernia removed!!! Hurray! Its been around as long as I have (I hope I'm not next on the chopping block!). Dr. Flanders said it was a great surgery. Everything went well. It was a hole about as big as my heart hole actually. It was 3/4 of an inch long. Hows that for coincidence! He didn't need to put in mesh (which would have made a longer recovery). He'll be down for a couple of weeks, and then slowly getting back into things, and be recovered about 6 weeks from now. We're relieved that all went well.

Now... for the funny stuff. Let's just say that Blaine is a funny guy on a normal day. Well on drugs, he is down right hysterical- uncensored and RAW. After the doctor comes in to tell me all is well, I was settling in for the wait while Blaine was taking time to wake up and the nurse pops up. She was taking me back telling me that usually patients are really sedated and sleep while they are trying to wake up, but not Blaine. Now, there were 8 patients in the one room, with only curtains dividing them. So, you add all the support spouses, doctors, nurses, etc, there were a lot of people in ear shot of Blaine, and no one else was talking, so they all heard EVERY WORD. They were hoping that I would settle him down. From down the hall I hear a "LISA!!!" She said, "yeah, that's him. He hasn't stopped talking since they woke him up." Apparently when the anastheliologist was doing a conscious sedation, Blaine kept blabbering so much and wouldn't shut up, it was distracting the surgeon so they ended up putting him to sleep. Then, when they woke him up again, he started talking again, and at a millions words a minute. Now, he was yelling down the hall for his wife. He kept yelling, "Where's my wife? She's the hot one! LISA!!!! Lisa, where are you!!" The nurse encouraged me to let him know I was on my way to help start the 'calming down', so I yelled back, "Blaine, I'm coming", and he yelled, "THAT'S HER! THAT'S MY WIFE! Go get her!!!" I came in and he was talking to himself so I held his hand, and he actually did calm right down. He had difficulty controlling not only the content of what he was saying, but the decibles at which he was talking. He would say things over and over, and then randomly yell things out even if someone else was talking. (The large print signifies him yelling at the top of his lungs) . Every conversation we had about 7 times. NO joke. same thing. over and over. Stuff like:


Blaine groggily says: Lisa, when did you get here? Have you been here long because I think that I'll be able to remember everything from this point on. (turning) now, what's your name?
Nurse: Karin
B: oh, that's my wifes name. I'm sorry, my mom's name. Only she spells it K-A_R_E_N. So, did they give me another drug besides Verced?
K: they gave you propoful.
B: This is good stuff. Do they sell it to regular people or do you have to have surgery to get it.
K: No, its just for surgery.
B: I like this stuff. You're hot! (to me). Isn't my wife hot? Look at her in those jeans. Can I see my stitches? Where does the incision start? What's this blue stuff? Pen? They drew on me? Is this ugly? It smells. Did they do stitches? Are they going to do stitches? They glued me? This feels like glue! They super glued me? My wife could have done that! Hi, what's your name?
K: Karin
B: Karen? My wife name is Karen. I'm sorry, my mom's name is Karen. Only she spells is K-A-R-E-N. Did they give me another drug besides Verced?
K: they gave you Propoful.
B: this is good stuff. Is this something I can get at a store, or do I have to have surgery? You're hot, Lisa. Can I see my stitches. (Lifts up gown-then lifts up blankets) I'M NAKED UNDER HERE! Hi, what's your name? K:Karin B:I NEED PIZZA! We should go to a night club.. I don't really drink, but we could have fun... HI, what's your name? Lisa, can we have S**?Doctor!!! Can we have S**??? (he's yelling this down the hall!) Hey, baby, I don't think we should do that little thing where (I put my hand over his mouth and told him he has to be quiet. He looked around mysteriously and said, OH?-pause.. Can I get some PIZZA! (turn, surprise) Lisa, when did you get here? Have you been here long because I think I will remember everything from this point on.... HI, What's your name?

Blaine's mom called, and Blaine begged to talked to her so I gave him the phone. He took the phone and said slyly, "HEY, BABY!"


The nurse came in with some pain killers and said, "Here's a cracker" Blaine said, "CRACK??? I've never had crack. My friends had crack. They had a crack house, but really is was just a dirty house, but I think one of them really had crack... so I guess it WAS a crack house! "

The nurse came in to talk about what to do at home, and during the middle Blaine screams, Serena Williams's a HO! (we had been watching tennis before the surgery hours ago). But then, Blaine wanted to watch TV, so after the nurse left he asked me to pull the TV that was attached to the wall. It wouldn't pull to the "right" spot so he asked me to pull the bed over two inches. So, here I am taking the breaks off, pulling my drugged husband's hospital bed around the room trying to get it to the "right" spot. "NO, over there! No, little more! I LOVE TV! A little more, no let me do it (tries to get up)....um, on second thought, you better do it."

Holy cow, I was in tears laughing so hard. I knew it would wear off, and Blaine settled way down after about 1o minutes, but it was a fun 10 mins. I took a little video after he was "coherant", but I should have used the camera the whole time. My writing is just not doing it justice. Those poor elderly people hearing all this going on...but I found him highly entertaining. But, I think Blaine is recovering nicely, and so hopefully he is back up and moving in no time. We're glad it went so well.

Baseball running amok!

The kids took their baseball pictures yesterday. They were cute, but since you can't exactly take a camera with you, I took some at home after.

Game Face

Game Face
"Not going to be left out" FaceBatting practice

Blaine has been playing too. The stake has been playing for a couple of weeks now. I bring the kids and we watch the guys play. Yesterday we had a RS activity, but all the wives still showed up for the game. Too much fun! The little boys get their own game going alongside the field, and the girls play at the park, and ALL the babies and wives watch. I admit, I have as much fun as Blaine. I love our ward, so any chance to hang out is a good one! We sit and cheer, and groan, and laugh. I mean, some guy (on the other team) tagged 3rd base with his face! Good times. And, hopefully Baseball doesn't kill Blaine. The first week, he pulled both hamstrings. Yeah...BOTH hamstrings. Then, his hernia popped out. This week, he messed up his hand. SOMEONE told him to go to the ER today to get it looked at, and SOMEONE told the first someone that he was leaving in a few minutes to go do that, only SOMEONE didn't end up going. He said he had too much work to do, and then needed to run to school. Of course, having surgery on Monday will mean that he isn't going to get it fixed for some time. Now that he can't play for awhile, I guess it won't matter much. .....right?

Going Under the Knife

Its been a few months, meaning??? Its about time for another Honester to go under the knife. This time, it's Blaine's turn. He got a Hernia about 8-9 years ago, but it never bothered him so he didn't do anything about it. Well, that changed recently where now he keeps hurting it with just about everything he does. Plus, he is trying hard to lose (weight) And can't really do much without hurting himself. So, he'll get it fixed. We didn't know it would all happen this soon. The only time he could really do it is going to be Monday. We didn't know it could take a month or so to heal. So, he is going to do it during the 6 weeks break from school. So, wish us luck,we hope this is no big deal, but being surgery.... it very well could be.

Life is coming at us fast!

And, its about freakin' time!!! Bryson's walking everywhere, and not crawling at all... BJ went potty on the toilet all day and wants to wear his underwear now (we'll see how long that keeps up)... Brandon's at a girl's party (who incidently is the sister of Brittany's "boyfriend" Christopher)... Blaine has only one more weekend of classes after tomorrow before he gets summer break...

Are you kidding me! Life might be calming down and making a turn for the better. Cross your fingers, this is usually when all heck breaks loose.

Brittany's new trick.

And, BJ's version (pardon the underwear, it helps him remember if he's naked).

Rumble in the Jungle

Baseball is becoming a full contact sport. Not for those playing, but for the spectators. Bryson face-planted on the metal bleachers after he tripped on a piece of sand (or something). It was one of those situations where there was so much blood I didn't know where the blood was coming from. He has three cut lines on his chin, and a big fat lip. (sorry no pictures) He happened to hit a sore gum from a molar that was coming through. He acted like he was dying. I'm sure it was the worst pain he's ever been in. Well, Brittany decided to one-up that by face-planting off some slides. The baseball field playground has these slides of death. My little daredevil decided to go down head first. She face-planted in the wood chips. It sounds harmless enough, but she gashed open her chin, and cut her cheek. There was a lady who was "helping" that happened to be an EMT. She really started getting on my nerve because the one thing in the world I hate is a crowd, especially when it isn't the best "mother of the year" moment. And she was panicking about Brittany needing stitches. She kept saying, "Get her shoes! Get her in the car! How far is the car? She needs stitches!! Hurray!!!" She even grabbed Brittany and started running, carrying her to the car like she needed a freakin' ambulance. Did she realize I had 3 other kids all scattered out across the park? All these people started crowding around to see what all the commotion was. It was a cut, people. A bad cut... but go away! (sidenote- I really get embarrased when people gather to see my hurt kids. Its pride, but its embarrasing to have them see that yep, I wasn't being as careful watching them, and I'm a horrible parent. I mostly feel like people will judge me because in EVERY situation like this I am usually judged and harshly, and we get into dumb situations like this a lot. Everyone is giving their opinion on what should be done in this situation, and I wish I had the courage to say, no, I don't want to hear your opinion, or hear what you think I should have done differently in this situation. GO AWAY!) Blaine was still at a meeting, so I grabbed Bryson, pulled BJ from the playground, kicking and screaming, grabbed Brittany's shoes that she chucked on the wayside, and ran to the car. Half way to the car Blaine came running up still in a suit. I threw the umbrella at him (did I mention it was raining?) and told Blaine to stay with Brandon until they called the game, and that I was going to go get Brittany fixed up. I got Brittany in the bath, and then while I was cleaning up, BJ got my watch and threw it in the bath. Its the only decent watch I've ever had, and now I don't know if it'll still work. We decided to not go for stitches. We did super glue and steri strips to hold it all together. Brandon had stitches when he was two, and it was horribly traumatizing, and did nothing for his face. Basically, when the stitches didn't work, this is what we did to really heal him up, so we thought we would skip the stitch step and go with this.

Once again, we were the freak show we usually are.